The foundation of true healing

For this month’s column, Integrative Counsellor Sam Grainger talks us through the stabilisation phase of trauma therapy — and why safety, regulation, and empowerment form the foundation of true healing

When someone experiences trauma, recovery doesn’t start with diving into painful memories. Before the deep work begins, there’s a crucial first step — the stabilisation phase. This is where safety, steadiness, and trust are built. It’s the groundwork that makes everything else possible.

“Without a safe base, there is no recovery — only survival.”

What Stabilisation Looks Like

This phase focuses on three intertwined goals: safety, symptom-management, and empowerment.

• Safety: Reducing chaos, stabilising daily life, and building supportive connections.
• Symptom-management: Learning tools to handle flashbacks, hyper-arousal, or emotional flooding.
• Empowerment: Re-establishing a sense of control — small steps back toward agency and self-trust.

Why Stabilisation Matters

Without this groundwork, trauma therapy can move too fast and cause harm. Entering memory work before a person feels safe can re-traumatise rather than heal.

As trauma expert Judith Herman wrote: “The first principle of recovery is the empowerment of the survivor. The guiding principle of recovery is to restore control to the person who has been powerless.”

That principle starts here.

Core Elements of the Stabilisation Phase

1. Establishing Safety Anchors

Safety isn’t only about environment — it’s also about inner stability. Clients and therapists identify safe spaces, supportive relationships, and daily rhythms that bring calm. When life feels unpredictable, these anchors hold everything steady.

2. Regulation and Coping Skills

Stabilisation teaches grounding, mindful breathing, and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to regulate the body’s alarm system.

In my experience, when you suggest meditation or EFT, it’s often met with scepticism or reluctance — and understandably so. For someone whose body doesn’t yet feel like a safe place, slowing down or “tuning in” can feel impossible.

But if this crucial step is missed, the system never truly steadies. Without a calm baseline, trauma processing later on can unravel progress instead of building it.

3. Psycho-education and Reframing

Knowledge is power. Learning how trauma reshapes the brain and nervous system replaces shame with understanding.

As psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk reminds us: “The body keeps the score: it remembers everything. Until you feel safe in your own body, you can’t begin to heal.”

This understanding helps clients see their reactions as protective, not pathological.

4. Re-establishing Identity and Empowerment

Trauma can fracture the sense of self. Stabilisation helps rebuild it by reconnecting people with what gives life meaning — values, relationships, creativity, and purpose. These small acts re-ignite a sense of me beyond survival.

5. Preparing for Deeper Work

Stabilisation isn’t a pause; it’s preparation. When a person feels regulated and grounded, they’re ready for trauma processing with support and confidence.

Therapist Janina Fisher summarises it well: “We don’t dive into the trauma story until the client’s nervous system can tolerate remembering. Stabilisation teaches the body that safety is possible again.”

The Reality of the Work

This phase can feel slow. There are no dramatic breakthroughs — but that’s the point. Progress here is subtle yet powerful: fewer flashbacks, steadier moods, better sleep, and an ability to manage triggers.

For some, stabilisation is the therapy. Once they can regulate and live without crisis, that itself is transformation.

The Takeaway

Stabilisation isn’t the warm-up act; it’s the foundation. When clients trust the process and give time to the slow work of safety and regulation, the deeper healing that follows has something solid to stand on.

“Stabilisation is where therapy stops being about surviving — and starts being about living.”

Visit Sam Grainger Counselling.

Featured image – supplied